How To Write The Most Original Fanfic of All Time: Chaos Story
by MaxBlayde
Summary: Hey there, kids! I'm sure you've all been facing the same issue lately? The one where you're trying to come up with an original plotline with interesting characters and realistic occurrences? Well search no more, my padawans, for I am here to present to you: How to write a Chaos Story, the most original of them all!
1. The Super-Original Plot

Hey there, kids! I'm sure you've all been facing the same issue lately? The one where you're trying to come up with an original plotline with interesting characters and realistic occurrences? Well search no more, my padawans, for I am here to present to you:

 **How to Write an Original PJO Fanfiction!**

* * *

The first step, my apprentices, is to piece together the _original and realistic_ _plotline_. I have cooked up an original plot that no one has ever used before, and I'm letting you guys use it. (Royalty free) I call my story/plot:

 **Perseus Jackson, Commander of the Army of Chaos** (bit of a mouthful)

1\. Now, to the things your super original, never-seen-before Chaos story NEEDS!

2\. Give Percy an absolute idiot of a brother. Never mind how Carl/Mark/Jayden are the same age as Percy and could've been the child of the prophecy, no that doesn't matter in this totally realistic, super original, never-seen-before Chaos story.

3\. Make his brother do feats that pale in comparison to Percy's, yet he will always be favored by everyone in Camp Half-Blood. Also, Camp Jupiter went for a walk in the park and never came back.

4\. Virtually everyone had to be OOC, including Poseidon, Annabeth and the rest of Camp Half-Blood.

5\. Now, Poseidon MUST disown Percy and Annabeth MUST cheat on him with his brother.

6\. Get Chaos, creator of the universe, to take in Percy as his assassin, ninja, general, ball boy and drink provider or something like that. (This is a good plot twist, as this has never EVER been done before.)

7\. Now Percy must be given a super-cool name by Chaos. Depending on the underlying tone of Percy you choose his name. If he's all depressed and shit give him a name like Silent Sam or Dark Daniel or Darkness. Or just screw it all and call him Athlon/Void/Starscrewer.

8\. Now Chaos' army must ALWAYS consist of dead character you forgot about, like the Wine Kid, Bianca di Angelo and Lee Fletcher etc. You must give them incredibly cool names as well.

9\. Now, come up with a unique ship. Not boring Percabeth! No we need something new, like Pertemis, Perstia or Perzoe!

10\. Make Percy learn really cool skills from Chaos like: the Force, ability to cause Lag and maybe add in some unicorn powers.

11\. Back on Earth, have all the previous villains from PJO come back to life somehow to fight the gods, and on top of that add in some new ones like: Apophis, Loki, Voldemort, Mr. Burns or Donald Trump.

12\. Percy and his army are sent to help and arrive at the most convenient of times. (When Camp Half-Blood is under attack, don't worry this is totally original and Camp Jupiter hasn't returned from that walk yet.

13\. Percy destroys the army with his Lag and Unicorn powers and then they all realize their savior is Percy Jackson. (Dramatic right?)

14\. In the whole chaos of the battle Percy _by accident_ hit his brother with a Dorito flying at high speed, controlled by the force, like a shuriken.

15\. You've sort of done everything, now make Percy lag everyone out and kill them with Dorito projectiles.

16\. This final battle must be epic! Have Percy fight Apophis/Loki/Voldemort/Mr. Burns/Donald Trump with the power of happiness to prove that happiness conquers all and to show your readers that if you want Donald Trump to kick the bucket, just be happy!

* * *

There you have it folks. If you want to see the perfect example of a Chaos story, check it out tomorrow, it'll take me some time to write such an original story with such a realistic plot that contains no plotholes.


	2. Example Template - 1 -

**Chaos Story: Example Template Part 1**

* * *

I was sad. No, I don't meant simple sadness, no I mean sad like you've been told that your WiFi is going down for a few hundred years.

I think that's taking it to far. A few HUNDRED years WITHOUT WiFi? Hell to the no!

Anyways, I was depressed.

I had just lost my girl, friends, and father to my douche of a half-sibling.

A half-sibling named Mark Dickhead.

* * *

 _Flashback:_

 _Mark had arrived at camp 3 weeks ago. I was very surprised he was my brother, because he such a jerk._

 _He'd instantly gained favor and popularity in camp, because he killed a goldfish named Harry that had defected from Poseidon's rule. The story got out that the goldfish was pure evil, he'd hacked Poseidon's Roblox account and deleted all of the sea gods Sex-Dungeon-Roleplay-Server IP Ports._

 _Of course everyone praised Mark for his accomplishment._

" _Nice job, Mark."_

" _Goldfish are very tough monsters, you are obviously extremely talented."_

" _I like how you skillfully stabbed the goldfish as it was lying still in his bowl! Absolutely magnificent!"_

 _My dad, apparently, though Mark was more worthy and declared him as his favorite son, in front of the whole camp. He was going to declare it to the Romans as well, but they'd run into some trouble on their way back from their walk._

 _I later asked him why he chose Mark over me, and Poseidon said it was that Mark hadn't used up Poseidon's palace's monthly WiFi quota in his stay there. I then pointed out that Mark hadn't been there, and if he had he would've used it all up as well and that the WiFi was really slow anyways._

 _Poseidon disowned me for that._

 _I thought my life couldn't get any worse, I'd lost my friends, my father and Mark had used up the monthly WiFi quota in his first day at camp. My half-sibling had spent the entire night playing Roblox, not the sex-dungeon-roleplay-servers though, his mom, a rich cruise ship owner, had banned him from playing that, so he played Cops-and-Robbers with his 11 year old Roblox friends._

 _However, it seemed the Fates hate me. I stumbled upon Mark and Annabeth, someone who had stuck by me during these terrible WiFiless days, making out in my cabin. I yelled and asked Annabeth why she was kissing Mark and she said she was into Roblox players and that she was dumping me._

 _That final straw broke the camel's back._

 _I ran away from camp, after making sure I had enough Cellular Data left. Sadly Zeus had cursed me to never have enough air-time to make a call, so I didn't bother checking that. I eventually reached a beautiful forest in mid-town Manhattan and sat down and cried like a little girl._

* * *

I was sad and had run out of Cellular Data, so I hadn't logged into my Clash of Clans account in a few days. Oh, the pain! All my mines and collectors must have been looted and I'd probably been attacked a billion times.

It was then a dark figure appeared. He was wearing a Star Wars hoodie and Star Wars shirt.

I, somehow, realized the man was Chaos.

Chaos looked at me in interest before saying, "Hello Percy, are you sad because you've run out of Cellular Data?"

I nodded in response before adding, "And my friends, father and girl betrayed me for my WiFi hogging brother, but that's not that important."

"Well," Chaos said, contemplating something, "You want to be my personal assassin/jedi/milkmaid/ninja/commander/toilet cleaner?"

I nodded again and Chaos grasped my hand.

We disappeared with the power of time and space.


	3. Example Template - 2 -

**Chaos Story: Example Template 2**

* * *

We landed in a room.

It was weird.

It was small.

It was a room.

I looked at Chaos and asked, "Does anyone else reside in this room?"

"Yeah," he said, "I shall call them."

Chaos humped a tree and soon a line of people appeared before him. I took a closer look at what I assumed was his army. I noticed a familiar face.

"Silena?" I said to the girl on the far right.

"Percy?" She said back to me, "Is that you?"

I smiled and ran up to my friend. We hugged. The other demigods started to surround us and I noticed a bunch of familiar faces.

"LUKE!?" I yelled, "SAW DUDE!" As I said that everybody stopped smiling and cricket noises filled the room. I just realized I'd spouted a dead meme. I then realized how OOC I must have been. Dead memes were for Nico, Hazel and Hades.

Bianca suddenly smiled, "I LOVE DEAD MEMES." I was happy I had one supporter, but I figured it would do best to change the subject.

"Chaos, I thought this was an army. This is simply like 8 people." ' _Phew nice save'_

Everyone shifted uncomfortably on their feet. Cricket noises filled the room yet again. Chaos decided to take the initiative and answer.

"Wow, we never really noticed that! I guess we'll change our name to the Assassins of Chaos."

That over and done with, I decided to meet some of the other Assassins.

It consisted of: Silena, Beckendorf, Ethan, Michael, Lee, Luke, Bianca, Zoe and Wine-Kid-Who's-Name-I-Never-Cared-To-Find-Out.

When I was finished I realized most of them had frowns on their faces. I quickly asked why.

"We don't like it when you call us those bad names, you see most of us only joined Chaos because he promised us dank cover names. We'd like that you use them, and if you do you'll get your own in due course." Luke decided to answer for everyone there.

"I'm Pepe The Frog, Zoe is Feminazi-From-Hugh-Mungus-Meme, Silena is , Beckendorf is Kazoo Kid, Ethan is Pirate-From-Spongebob-Intro-Song, Michael is Grumpy Cat, Lee is Sanic, Bianca is John Cena, because it's a dead meme and Wine-Kid-Who's-Name-I-Never-Cared-To-Find-Out is Wine-Kid-Who's-Name-I-Never-Cared-To-Find-Out." Said Luke excitedly and proudly.

"I wish I had a cool and hip name." I muttered enviously.

* * *

 **The next day:**

"Percy Dankson," said Chaos in that automated voice used in memes, "Before I teach you your abilities I must give you a dank af name fam."

"Dat lit af fam." I replied. I only used the abbreviation of 'as fuck' because Chaos didn't tolerate swearing, which ruined a lot of memes, but it wasn't too bad. His enforcement of rules wasn't too good, sadly. My designated bedtime was 7:00 but I went to bed at 7:05.

Thug life.

"You ready to hear it fam, it gonna be lit af fam!"

"Yeh of course fam, we all about that fam." I replied.

"Perseus Dankson of the city of England," Chaos said dramatically, or as dramatically as an automated voice popularized by memes can be, "I remove you stupid af name and give you a lit one. Welcome to my army Big Shaq!"

"Dat lit af fam." I replied.

"Now onto your abilities, it is teaching time."

"Yes fam, we all about that fam, can't wait to learn some new stuffs fam, what we gonna learn about first fam?" I asked.

"We are going to be able to separate dank memes from dead memes." He said solemnly, or as solemnly as an automated voice popularized by memes can be.

"Ha, I can already do that fam. I was born ready." **A/N Catch da Big Shaq reference?**

"Wow, that is some achievement Big Shaq, but I bet you that you don't have immunity to heat!" Chaos said, annoyed that his classes were proving useless.

"Man's not hot." I said.

"Yes, now you may not be hot, Big Shaq, but you will get hot eventually."

"Man's never hot." I replied.

"You may be able to do that, but I bet you can't use the Force!"

"I took man Twix by Force, once." I replied

"AAAARRGGGHHH!" Chaos' voice, when frustrated, simply sounded like a song with 100x bass.


	4. Example Template - 3 -

**Example Template: Part 3**

Chaos had been a decent teacher: He'd taught me many things and granted me many powers. I'd soon had all the powers of the Olympians and a few special one's of my own, like my Force powers and Meme Master.

It had 69 years since I'd left Camp Half-Blood. I was extremely happy that I left camp, because Memeland, the place I've been living in for 69 years, has much better WiFi.

Chaos had informed me that the demigods and Olympians were not only fighting the Titans and Gaia once more, but other enemies like Voldemort and Harry, the evil goldfish, who'd been resurrected by Gaia, as she needed some help in being more evil, and who better to go to than the defective goldfish that deletes Roblox porn servers?

It was time for me, Big Shaq, and my fellow memes to bring balance to the world once more.

 **Meanwhile at Camp Half-Blood**

"FALL BACK!"

Camp was being overrun by monsters, giants, titans, pot plants, dead memes, feminazis and Donald Trump supporters. Many of the campers had been killed by the mob and the remaining survivors with the hunters of Artemis were trying to fight back, but to no avail.

There is no stopping the cancer that is modern-day feminism.

"Oof!" Mark made the signature Roblox death/injury noise, upon being struck by a hibiscus on the hip, though he quickly fought back and resumed killing some pot plants. He then saw a warrior glowing with a grey light and wearing a thick jacket, and some other figures, like a frog, descend from the heavens.

The rest of the demigods and hunters looked on in awe, as the warriors attacked some of the monsters. That caused the rest of the army of monsters to charge.

The commander of the Assassins of Chaos looked around before getting heat by multiple beams of fire, courtesy of a more vicious feminazi, he had not been affected, and shouted, "MANS NOT HOT!" Before using the force to fling Doritos around like shuriken killing most monsters.

One Dorito hit Mark. The son of Poseidon only managed the signature Roblox 'Oof' before dying.

Artemis checked the warrior and found he was lit af in the handsomeness department.

All the surviving campers and hunters cheered, before Big Shaq, revealed himself as Perseus Dankson. They all gasped and begged for forgiveness in the form of unlimited Robux.

Big Shaq didn't give a damn and put one arm around Artemis. They started making out for the hell of it.

Annabeth started to cry, her life had gone downhill since Big Shaq left. She'd been kicked out of her Clan in CoC and had her Bin Weevils account hacked overnight, and now he had returned and was kissing another girl.

The rest of the battles were dominated by either Big Shaq or Artemis, but it was Big Shaq most of the time. He destroyed his enemies with his Meme Mastery and Dorito shurikens. However, all the other assassins who we don't care about died at the hands of the enemy.

Except for Wine-Kid-Who's-Name-I-Never-Cared-To-Find-Out. He survived.

Somehow…

So it all came down to Big Shaq's last battle between a mutated Harry who'd smoked to much weed to last night and was totally stoned.

Harry glowed all the colors of evil, whereas Big Shaqglowed all the colors of memes.

It was an epic fight.

Harry would hop around on his fins, deleting Big Shaq's Moshi Monsters accounts and spouting out embarrassing sections of Big Shaq's search history, while Big Shaq shot Doritos at him and inflicted the goldfish with debuffs by using Meme Mastery.

They finally decided to bring out the big guns.

Harry shot out a black laser beam while Big Shaq shot out a beam of music.

Somehow…

Harry's beam hit Big Shaq in the testicles. "SKRRAAAAAA!" Screamed Big Shaq.

Big Shaq tripped and fell down in pain.

" _Percy…"_

Big Shaq looked around to see his dead friends and that chick Artemis.

"You have to defeat Harry with lag." Said Artemis.

"The problem is," whined Big Shaq, "MY WEAKNESS IS LAG, I CAN'T HANDLE IT!"

"Good point," said Luke, "Just punch him really hard, he does look really stoned.

"Oh yeah, why didn't I think of that." Percy thought out loud.

Mind made up he walked up and poked Harry really hard.

Harry screamed in pain and died.

 _Epilogue:_

 _Zeus tried to be the overbearing dad._

" _What are your intentions with my daughter, Dankson?"_

 _-Big Shaq/Percy Dankson has changed his name to Barry McCockinner._

 _That done, everyone lived happily ever after, with no lag, unlimited Roblox sex-dungeon-roleplay-servers, Bin Weevils accounts, memes and wonderful WiFi._

 **That's it folks. I want to thank you guys for sitting through this story. It's been real emotional and just today I looked back at my first chapter and nearly cried. You've been wonderful fans, and for that I allow you to use my totally original plot and story.**

 **Barry McCockinner**


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